What a New Pocketbook Taught Me About My Money Belief
(by Susan James)
For those that have read my writing you may remember that
money started out to be the thorn in my side and the speck in
my eye, as it is for many of us. One of the themes I tend to
write about is money. From not having to having and how I
expanded along my way.
I am happy to say, My money is good, well great actually; has
been for a long time.. By that I mean, I easily spend money on
things I want and love having, with no resistance. I have no
problem spending money on my business, my livelihood, food,
entertainment, inventory, gifts etc. while also stashing good
amounts away.
Here comes ‘the BUT’.
Recently, my sister and niece did our annual day at ‘Martha’s
Market’ in Charlottesville. It’s a wonderful day of high end
entrepreneurship held in the John Paul Jones Arena. This was
the 25th anniversary of the event which is in full support of the
Martha Jefferson Foundation.
Almost as soon as we arrived, I went looking for the booth
where I had purchased a sterling silver rope design bracelet last
year. I knew the artist would have more. And there she was.
Yay, got it!
Another one, same design, smaller thread. Perfect! Easy Spend,
no matter the cost.
I am not a pocketbook person. I have a leather one that I’ve
had for years. It’s perfect for me and it stays in the car. It holds
a book, or tablet and phones, wallets etc. Didn’t want or need a
new one.
However, for the past 2 years, my sister kept telling me, ‘let me
buy you a new one.’ (She’s a major pocketbook person!) I kept
saying ‘NO, thank you, I don’t need another one.’ She says:
‘well if you ever see one you really want, let me get it for you
for your birthday, Christmas, whatever.’ I said: ‘ok,’ just to get
her off my back about it, knowing that I really wasn’t looking
for one, and I’d rather she get me something I wanted vs
something I didn’t really want.
So, at Martha’s Market, I see this large blue thick leather
pocketbook. I walk over to it and the Artist / entrepreneur
starts telling me about it; that she designed it and had an Amish
fellow make it.
It was perfect. Thick Leather, iPad would fit easily and it would
be over the shoulder, perfect.
Great pockets in it. The price tag was $415.00. I said: SOLD!
(And NO, my sister is not reimbursing me for this, as we
already had this conversation!)
Now, to the point of this writing. When I got home, something
didn’t ‘feel’ right. I felt a ‘weight’ of sorts. I figured it was all
the food I ate out of the norm, but I was feeling cranky. The
next morning, I woke up feeling cranky. So NOT how I feel
99% of the time.
I wanted this feeling gone and I didn’t know what it was about.
Longer story short, I decided I needed to ‘degrease’ it. So I
went about doing The Done Deal Degreaser.
What I found, uncovered, discovered was this:
I was judging myself on spending money on something that I
don’t really ‘enjoy’ and then I felt bad about it. Meaning, I
don’t enjoy ‘pocketbooks’. I don’t use them other than to
throw in the car if I’m going out of town. I don’t put them in
the car for day to day stuff. I don’t need it.
I kept writing. I needed to find what this was really about. AND
then it came. I had an underlying fear of what if things were to
go bad again and I’ve spent a good chunk of money on
something that I really don’t enjoy having or need. Wasted
Money.
Bottom Line: It was about a ‘fear of things going bad again’.
I had to ‘go higher’ to get out of this. I had to ask my Higher
Self how it viewed my purchase of the pocket book. HS was
very open about it. It didn’t matter.
And what I do know and did know even as I wrote it out, I’ve
been in a place for along time that I know I can move energy
and manipulate things due to what I’ve taught myself via higher
tools, higher mechanics.
The Good News about this, was as soon as I ‘surfaced and
acknowledged’ what the resistance was, its like my cells opened
up and said ‘Thanks, we feel better now’. The resistance, the
heaviness was gone. And I knew, that, that was ALL I had to
do. I did not have to do anything about this, other than ‘surface
and acknowledging’ where I was having resistance.
And the thing is, even if the pocketbook was only a $100,
instead of 415, it still would have caused me resistance.
Because even that much for something I really don’t need or
want or enjoy having would have caused me the resistance.
Does this mean that I can be frivolous about my spending? And
that its ok to spend money on things that I may have felt were
not needed, wasteful? No, but it doesn’t have anything to do
with that question anyway. It meant my perspective needed to
change or the resistance would show up in some other area, not
necessarily having to do with money.
And the other side of this was I LOVE supporting Creative
Folks, Entrepreneurs.
What it does mean simply is where I had built some resistance
in flow, that can show up in other events, circumstances related
to money and not related to money. The pocketbook showed
me where I had some ‘thick energy’, some resistance to flow,
and it needed to be released.
Done Deal!
AND I now love my new pocketbook, simply for helping me
open up to MORE! Of Everything!
And Speaking of Everything…
I have a new website that simply displays, Everything Susan
James EveryThing Susan James
And from this website, you can also take a peek at the updated
‘Susan James Methods of Manifestation Courses!
Susan James Courses
(It was the info developed in these courses which led
me out of where I was to where I preferred to be!)
Best and Splendid Success in All Ways to Everyone!
Susan James
Susan James / Vast Five Publishing / 426 Writer, LLC
Vast Five Publishing